This is the worst part of the job. You wake up, roll over, check your phone like you always do- one of those ingrained habits of modern life that have dug into your brain and muscle memory. There, all over your social media are profile pictures, badges crossed in blue, state outlines crossed in blue. Your heart sinks and you scroll through to find out what happened. Two officers gunned down in Des Moines overnight, sitting in their cars.

Whenever I had to change the Department's Facebook page after one of these tragedies, I always used to take some comfort from the fact that I could count on both hands the number of times I've had to do it over the years. Hating it, wishing there was more than just words you could say, support you could offer. But now I seem to be running out of digits.

This is the worst part of the job.

My thoughts and prayers are with the friends, family and colleagues of the fallen officers of the Des Moines Police Department and the Urbandale Police Department today.


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